Tag Archives: therapeutic

Listening to a loved one going through hardship can make a positive impact on that person’s life.


Listening to a loved one going through hardship can make a positive impact on that person's life.

Listening to a loved one going through hardship can make a positive impact on that person’s life.

Listening to a loved one going through hardship can make a positive impact on that person’s life.

Have you ever been through those tough times when you had someone to listen to you. It wasn’t about being told what to do or how to solve your problem. Many times, you know what you have to do, or you have strategies on your next moves. Just having someone there listening to you felt comforting right.

Wishing you well!

Enter the +positive masters+ universe at www.positivemasters.com for mindset practices, motivational writing, business development strategies, and inspirational apparel to boost your happiness and counter any anxiety, sadness, or anger you may be facing.

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Cognitive Distortions 10 – Don’t assume responsibility for something you’re not responsible for.


Don't assume responsibility for something you're not responsible for.

Don’t assume responsibility for something you’re not responsible for.

Cognitive Distortions 10 – Don’t assume responsibility for something you’re not responsible for.

For example, you have a friend who is abusive towards his girlfriend, so you have a talk with him on ways to resolve an issue without resorting to violence. After a number of heart-to-heart talks, your friend hits his girlfriend again. This crushes you, and you tell yourself, “I must be a bad friend.” No, you did the best you could to reach out to your friend to change his behavior, but he didn’t. What your friend ultimately does, is his responsibility, not yours.

Maybe you’re helping your little cousin to do her homework. However, she still doesn’t complete her homework. Don’t put blame on yourself. You can only help her so much. Your little cousin has to make an effort on her own to learn from her studies and finish her homework.

Stay positive my friends!

Enter the +positive masters+ universe at www.positivemasters.com for mindset practices, motivational writing, business development strategies, and inspirational apparel to boost your happiness and counter any anxiety, sadness, or anger you may be facing.

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I hold the warmth of your lonely soul – Part 2


I hold the warmth of your lonely soul.

I hold the warmth of your lonely soul.

I hold the warmth of your lonely soul.

Let your fears go.

Let them fly away and dissipate.

That’s how we’ll make our escape.

– +positive masters+, Jon Riki Karamatsu, Poem, 6/22/2019 –

You can be physically lonely, and you can be mentally lonely. Your fears can control your mind. You may keep them within you because you don’t want anyone to see your vulnerability. However, by talking about your fears to someone who is understanding, that person may be able to help you to take the necessary steps to push away your perception of your fears, which are often distorted. Talk therapy or psychotherapy with an understanding person can help you break out of your blown out of proportion perception.

In nonattachment, a practice developed in Buddhism, feel your negative emotions but don’t let them be attached to you and bring you down. In the Eightfold Path, the first of the eight practices is to have a right understanding, which is to do your best to understand the truth. Ask yourself, “What is the truth to your fears?” Are your fears real, or are you imagining them? For example, if you’re telling yourself you’re not good enough to succeed, is that really true? No, you’ve succeeded before. Yes, you’ve failed in the past, but that was a part of the process of your growth that led you to succeed again. When you look back in your life, you’ll identify how you’ve made your comeback from your failures. You see, your fears are often filled with things that aren’t true. Don’t let your fears be attached to you. Understand your fears, and let them flow through you so you don’t get held back by them.

Another mindset practice that we mentioned in previous blog posts is the middle way practice that was also developed in Buddhism, which is to stay in the middle of your life’s journey. In this case, by staying in the middle way, you’ll be able to see your extreme perceptions of your fears at a distance to the side or both sides, but you can move past them as your proceed down the middle path.

Combine the middle way practice with psychotherapy, cognitive therapy, nonattachment, and right understanding as an arsenal of tools to overcome your fears.

I wrote the poem pictured in this blog post over a year ago. In it, the protagonist tells his lover to let go of her fears after she bravely reveals them to him (psychotherapy and non attachment). He not only keeps her warm physically, but mentally and spiritually.

With Warmest Aloha,
Jon

Enter the +positive masters+ universe at www.positivemasters.com for mindset practices, motivational writing, wealth development strategies, and inspirational apparel to boost your happiness and counter any anxiety, sadness, or anger you may be facing.

 

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Enjoy a floral lei to lift your spirits!


Enjoy a floral lei to lift your spirits!

Enjoy a floral lei to lift your spirits! Pictured is a white plumeria flower lei.

Enjoy a floral lei to lift your spirits!

May 1, 2020 is Lei Day in Hawaii. Enjoy a floral lei to lift your spirits! With its beauty and sweet smell, flowers evoke your sight and smell, which can be therapeutic if you’re feeling stressed. Also, giving a lei to someone is a way to show your love to that person. As we say in Hawaii, May Day is Lei Day!

Enter the +positive masters+ universe at www.positivemasters.com for mindset practices, motivational writing, and apparel with inspirational mantras and designs to boost your happiness and counter any stress, anxiety, sadness, or anger that you may be facing.

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Don’t blow things up out of proportion or minimize them.


Don't blow things up out of proportion or minimize them.

Don’t blow things up out of proportion or minimize them.

Cognitive Distortions – Part 6

Don’t blow things up out of proportion or minimize them.

When you fail, don’t exaggerate your errors and imperfections. Don’t blow them up way out of proportion because doing so will cause you unnecessary grief. Everyone make mistakes. Failure plays a huge role in your learning process; however, you may fear it as you get older. Constantly remind yourself that failure is part of your growth. If you fall down, you can get back up again stronger by learning from your mistakes. When you tried to walk as baby, you would fall down often, sometimes getting injured; yet, you kept getting up and trying again until walking became second nature.

Products, services, and philosophical and scientific theories are proven through trial and error. Thomas Edison went through thousands of prototypes before he was able to successfully create the light bulb. Henry Ford became financially broke 5 times and was advised to stay away from the automobile industry. He persisted until he successfully developed automobiles for the commercial market.

Even Albert Einstein struggled. As a student, he performed so poorly that he nearly decided to drop out and sell life insurance. After graduating from the Swiss Polytechnic Institute at 21 years old, Einstein had to work many odd jobs to sustain himself. His father died believing he was a failure. Einstein was emotionally crushed. Eventually, he became employed as a patent clerk. He would review patents and analyze mathematical equations daily, and he loved it. Einstein’s passion for math led him down the path to becoming one of the greatest scientists in world history. This example shows how failure can lead you to your passions.

Some failures are out of your control such as a car exploding and crashing into your vehicle, causing you to miss an important meeting that that ended badly with the investor leaving. Or, like our current situation with the Coronavirus, a pandemic spreads, causing the economy to shut down, which leads to you losing money. In these situations that are out of your control, don’t exaggerate the errors and imperfections. Instead, always have gratitude for the positive – you are still alive.

Neither should you exaggerate the errors and imperfections of others. By doing so, you will lash out undue judgment. This is where having empathy for others can tame your distorted view on the failure of others. Remind yourself that you could fail just as bad or worse. If you place hell on others, be ready to receive the same wrath from people when you fail at the same thing.

When I was a litigation attorney, I was once stuck in traffic for almost 2 hours on the freeway, on my way to Honolulu District Court from West Oahu because of an accident ahead of me. I arrived at the courtroom with 5 minutes before it was to start; but the judge was already sitting in her chair gaveling the start of the hearing. She berated me without giving me a chance to apologize. A year later, that same judge was almost a half an hour late to another court hearing. She sat down and oversaw the hearing like nothing happened. She didn’t even apologize to any of us. In this real life example, the judge blew things way out of proportion for me even though I had 5 minutes more before the court was to begin; whereas, she treated her tardiness like it never happened. Moral of the story, don’t blow things out of proportion for the errors of others either. You will cause unnecessary stress on your target and others around you. When you make the same mistake, shit will start flying back at you, whether it is uncomfortable stares or more. People like that also seem to have less friends because they hold high standards on others that doesn’t apply to themselves.

Lastly, when it comes to your strengths, don’t minimize them. For instance, when you achieve a nice score on your test, don’t minimize your success by telling yourself that you were just lucky when you studied your butt off. When your third attempt at a start-up company finally succeeds, don’t pass it off as simply being lucky. No, you worked darn hard for many years to get where you are. You sacrificed by living with little money to build your business. Embrace your success. Don’t shrink them. Nor should you minimize the success of others. They also sacrificed a lot to achieve them. Be happy for them. If you’re minimizing yourself now, let me say this, “You’re great, and you deserve those wins! Keep crushing it!”

Enter the +positive masters+ universe at http://www.positivemasters.com for mindset practices, motivational writing, and apparel with inspirational mantras and designs to boost your happiness and counter any stress, anxiety, sadness, or anger that you may be facing. ❤️

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In order to see all the wonderful things around us and dispel our cognitive distortions, we must fully live in the present.


In order to see all the wonderful things around us and dispel our cognitive distortions, we must fully live in the present.

In order to see all the wonderful things around us and dispel our cognitive distortions, we must fully live in the present.

In order to see all the wonderful things around us and dispel our cognitive distortions, we must fully live in the present. 😊

– +positive masters+, 2/23/2020, Jon Riki Karamatsu –

You have to be fully present if you want to go into your mind and dispel your distortive thoughts that make you anxious, sad, and angry. You have to be fully present if you want to consistently see all the great things in your life.

Pictured is our Angry Explosion Beanie in navy color to encourage you to fully live in the present and manage your anger. Life is too short and too important to be angry, most of which aren’t worth getting angry over. You can purchase this beanie at www.positivemasters.com!!

Enter the +positive masters+ universe at www.positivemasters.com for mindset practices, motivational writing, and apparel with inspirational mantras and designs to boost your happiness and counter any stress, anxiety, sadness or anger that you may be facing. ❤️

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I changed my mind regarding watching television shows and playing video games.


I changed my mind regarding watching television shows and playing video games.

I changed my mind regarding watching television shows and playing video games.

I changed my mind regarding watching television shows and playing video games. If they bring joy into your life and help you to alleviate your stress and anxiety, go ahead and consume them in moderation to get that boost of energy that you need to keep working on your dream life.

I hardly ever play video games and rarely watch television programs. I don’t have any video games on my computer, nor do I have a game console at home. About five years ago, I deleted any video game from my smart phone.

This all changed this past Saturday January 25, 2020 when my 9-year-old second cousin E showed me how much he loves the video game “The Battle Cats” by Ponos Corporation (Known as “Battle Nekos,” as named by the founders in Japan), available for smart phones and tablets. He showed me how to play it. The characters are so darn cute, and the battles are fun, like a journey. There’s also funny descriptions for the scenes and characters and motivational comments that are applicable to your life. Playing it was like a tasty medicine that makes you high with pleasure. During the time I played the game, it took my mind off of the darkness that has been clouding my mind and soul: the deaths of those I love, dealing with difficult people and issues, facing prison time for my driving under the influence, opposition against my business projects and career, financial challenges, and other things bothering me. In moderate doses, “The Battle Cats” has recharged my energy to get myself back in the game of business and personal growth. I’m going all-out again after my latest bout with darkness when this past Christmas ended and my sister Mia and her family left Hawaii to return back to California.

The Battle Cats, a video game by Ponos Corporation for your smart phone and tablet.

The Battle Cats, a video game by Ponos Corporation for your smart phone and tablet.

As far as watching television, I avoid the news because of its negativity, but I recently began watching more fictional stories and documentaries that has sparked ideas for my fictional and nonfictional writing and motivated me to keep moving forward on my business projects, personal development, and my dreams for a life of creativity and more time with my loved ones.

So there it is, I changed my life policy on avoiding television shows and video games. In moderation, it can actually be a tool to recharge yourself so you can continue to play your real-life game in your career and personal growth.

———-

Enter the +positive masters+ universe at www.positivemasters.com for mindset practices, motivational writing, and apparel with inspirational mantras and designs to boost your happiness and counter any stress, anxiety, sadness or anger that you may be facing. ❤️

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